Dear Green Goblin,
What is up with your ridiculous getup? I don’t mean the purple elf costume. I mean the horrible metal Power Ranger deal from the movie. You look like green Ultraman. On what planet is ‘giant metal codpiece’ a good fashion choice? Why the weird trident deal? A supersonic glider that shoots missiles, pumpkin-themed grenades that reduce men to skeletons, and a trident? Do you expect to do battle with the king from The Little Mermaid? Do you seriously expect to beat a man with the proportionate strength of a spider in one on one combat with a trident?
But really I think you’re one of the coolest supervillains ever. Killing Spider-Man’s girlfriend? Awesome! 30 years of Spider-Man stories revolving around that one act. I just can’t understand why you would wear a costume that makes you look even worse than that flamboyant Keebler elf costume.
Yours,
Keith McGuffey
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